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Telstra Song

The Telstra Song


Ian Enting, circa 2015.



To the tune of: The times they are a changing. With apologies to Bob Dylan.


First published in Triangle News, the Marysville and District Lions club community newsletter.



Oh gather round people wherever your home

While waiting for telstra to fix up your phone

And getting an answer's like blood from a stone

And the internet's constantly failing

And it's no real comfort you're far from alone

And it's useless trying complaining

Oh mothers and fathers retired by the beach

With failure of internet, email and speech

Your sons and your daughters are now out of reach

And telstra's the one you're all blaming

No matter how hard you may beg or beseech

It's useless trying complaining.

Come senators and backbenchers please hear the call

The regulator is dropping the ball

On reliable internet access for all

That's why independents are gaining

When governments sit and do nothing at all

When it's useless trying complaining .


Your calls are on hold for hours each day

To get to a person who has nothing to say

You can try to make contact each possible way

But solutions you won't be obtaining

Then a text says it's fixed but it fails the next day

And it's useless trying complaining.


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